The "Sameness" of Intimate Partners

Some forms of couple therapy have emphasized the importance of helping couples differentiate–helping them see each other as two separate individuals, instead of succumbing to a type of “twinning” where only alikeness is tolerated.  There are certainly benefits to helping couples resist the draw to substitute being alike for being close.  However, ignoring the nonconscious “sameness” of intimate partners is also missing an opportunity to make use of the right-brain natural attraction of similars in service of healing.